It can be quite exhilarating or very exhausting. For one who has aging parents who need my help more than ever I can tell you, is quite exhausting at times. They say that you have kids so when you are old they can take care of you. It is so true, sometimes you need to provide for them also.
First step was to help them move out of their home into a retirement center. That was the best things I ever did. It took about 2 years of convincing, but now they can still have their independence yet have the help with driving and getting around to all the doctors’ appointments and shopping. The hard part was moving them out of a home that they lived in for more than 50 years.
My dad was never one to throw anything out. Being a farmer and an inventor, he might need that thing someday. You can just imagine what treasures we found when we dug to the back of a cupboard. Mind you this was a large two-story farm-house. Convincing them to down size and only take “what they need”, then sorting the rest to donations, split between the kids and grand kids, then what was plain garbage. Wow, can you see the problems we had?
Now that they have been there a few years, they love it. But then my problems just focused on other dilemmas. I convinced them to sell the car, I would be there if they needed something special that the bus could not take them too. Yes, I know what you are thinking….everything they seem to need is “special”. That is not so bad, because I always seem to get something from the trip.
Lately, the exhausting thing is their failing bodies, and memory. You need to put yourself in a different frame of mind when you are “needed”. Slower your pace…so they can keep up, unless they are in the scooters, then you need to run. They have trouble seeing things, (large print) hearing things, (TV is on the loudest volume), and the new jargon that people speak nowadays needs translating. Then there is the memory. Just keep in mind that you will hear the same thing over and over again and will be repeated every time you interact with them. Just answer all of it differently and see if that triggers a new conversation, or something they will remember.
Don’t get me wrong I love my parents dearly and I have their security in the highest regards, but they are children on the loose and set in their ways. They can be hard to control, stubborn, difficult, yet enjoyable all at the same time.
Where do you want to be when you grow up? I know you have heard this many times in your lifetime. Have you found it yet or do you need some help? I don’t want a lot of that burden put on my kids so I am securing my future. Want the same for yourself? Just ask me how….click here…. I will be there for you too.